Hello there,
As the subject line states, habits, not resolutions. I let go of resolutions years ago because I feel habits are much more attainable and manageable when trying to affect change in oneself. As humans, we have a long way to go until our habits start to change culture and inevitably the politics and the ecosystems we participate in. These days, the challenge is the bombardment of images (moving and still) along with global news and trends being available to us at the touch of our fingertips. I miss good ole fashioned phone conversations! I miss reading through the TV Guide and waiting anxiously for the following episode of Twin Peaks. I miss writing and making things for myself. Yet the sad reality is there is no one book, method, practice, or action that will relieve us of our intellectual and emotional exhaustion. Despite all of this, I’m hopeful, truly (even though my tone might seem rather melancholic and pessimistic).
The biggest lesson I’ve learned this past year (pulled this from Tarot reader, Jericho Mandybur)-let go or be dragged. It’s true. I’ve been through so major traumas in the past few years, lost friendships, experienced heartache, emotional and physical abuse. Yet it’s been such a healing experience for me to find friendship and love in places I never expected such as the tarot community I’m slowing, but surely building and sustaining. Now, I’ve been reading tarot since I was a teenager (I’m 41 years old!) and finally decided to start reading for strangers about two years ago and it’s been nourishing and empowering. I often have to remind folks that it’s not about me predicting the future or using my skills and sensibilities to give them (re)solutions. That’s all on the seeker. What I love the most is the fact that I get to engage in intense conversations about how people want to change, find away out of their pain and suffering, or build their confidence. Many folks I read for, I don’t see again. Some have come back and it’s been pretty magical to see growth and self-reflection. This practice has also pulled me out of major depression and anxiety, which I’ve experienced for many years. As someone who is a full-time PhD student and part-time program manager for a small non-profit, I must say that tarot has become a refuge from the world as well. It’s helped me put many things into perspective.
Speaking of perspective, it’s been a strange start to the year. One of the professors I deeply admired and impacted the way I integrate complex ideas who taught me during my first year at UC Santa Cruz passed away on New Year’s eve. With all these feelings and emotions coupled with wildfires in Australia to what is happening in Iran, I’m feeling helpless, scared, and anxious. I’m saddened by the loss and destruction happening all around us. Yet reminded of how much we’ve got live every day of our lives filled with all the messiness and joyous moments to the absolute fullest.
I should share some articles and books I’m reading before I hit the road. I promised a friend I would go see the Cats film. I have no idea what to expect, but I’ll let you know in my next missive. I haven’t exactly heard great things about it.
Last thing, if you no longer want to receive this newsletter (I switched platforms and now using substack), simply unsubscribe. No hurt feelings. I want to write and share things with folks that will find use in my words and want to engage and exchange information. For those that stick around, I’ll be certain to share a bit more consistently than I have been in recent years. I also welcome feedback on what you would like to read in these newsletters. Thanks for all of your support and care! ♥️
All love,
Dorothy
What I’m reading…
Barack Obama’s top 10 secret government surveillance programs of 2019 by Shuja Haider
The Killing of Qassem Suleimani is Tantamount to an Act of War by Robin Wright
All of the information posted to the Disability Intersectionality Summit site especially the #AccessisLove project (along with the generous resources and book list) created by Sandy Ho, Mia Mingus, and Alice Wong
In the Dream House, a memoir by Carmen Maria Machado
Where I’m Going…
In June, I will be a speaker at EYEO 2020! Special thanks to Carmen Aguilar y Wedge and Ece Tankal of Hyphen Labs, an incredibly talented artist collective for this wonderful invitation.
Writing Prompt:
To be on the much more optimistic side of things, in what ways are you helping change the culture around you (small and big, doesn’t matter)? What habits have you nurtured that you’re most proud of and bringing into 2020 (and beyond)?
Looking forward to hearing from you. ☺️